Alsop's Small Thoughts

Over Caffeinated Travel Alerts

You'll have to be dedicated to reading rants about United Airlines to get through this one, but I couldn't resist documenting this online for posterity! I had a reservation on UA 844, departing SFO for LAX at 2:59pm on Monday, October 27. What happened that afternoon was a classic!

At 12:11pm, before I left the office (I parked my car at the airport), I received a re-assuring confirmation that the flight was due to leave on time.

Monday, October 27, 2008 12:11 PM

** UNITED AIRLINES DEPARTURE REMINDER MESSAGE **

The following flight is scheduled for departure:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight Number: 844

Departing From: San Francisco California (SFO)

Traveling To: Los Angeles International (LAX)

Date: October 27

Gate: 73 (Gate is subject to change)

Estimated Departure Time: 2:59 p.m.on time

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight times are subject to change. Please check the flight information monitors at the airport.

Being a diligent traveler, I left the office around 12:40pm. As I was pulling away I got the following flight cancellation notice. I also got an automated phone call, to United's credit.

Monday, October 27, 2008 12:51 PM

** UNITED AIRLINES FLIGHT CANCELLATION MESSAGE **

The following flight has been cancelled:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight Number: 844

Departing From: San Francisco California (SFO)

Traveling To: Los Angeles International (LAX)

Date: October 27

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We may have already booked you on an alternate flight. Please contact a United Customer Service Representative or call United Reservations at 1-800-241-6522.

We apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused.

As a result of the phone notification, I called United from my car and managed to rebook myself on the next flight, UA 119. Shortly after that, while still driving toward the airport, I got another (presumably re-assuring) notification that this flight was on time.

Monday, October 27, 2008 1:13 PM

** UNITED AIRLINES DEPARTURE REMINDER MESSAGE **

The following flight is scheduled for departure:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight Number: 119

Departing From: San Francisco California (SFO)

Traveling To: Los Angeles International (LAX)

Date: October 27

Gate: 74 (Gate is subject to change)

Estimated Departure Time: 3:58 p.m.on time

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight times are subject to change. Please check the flight information monitors at the airport.

Shortly after I parked my car and got into the airport, I received the following rebooking message, which startled me. I calmed down when I realized that United had rebooked me automatically from the cancelled flight. I was only amused (instead of enraged) that they had rebooked me on a flight for the following day, just to get to Los Angeles, to which they must have at least 14 or more flights a day.

Monday, October 27, 2008 1:22 PM

** UNITED AIRLINES FLIGHT REBOOKING MESSAGE **

Dear ALSOP / STEWART MR II,

We regret to inform you that a delay has affected the following flight(s):

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight Number: 844

Operated By: United Airlines

Departing From: San Francisco California (SFO)

Traveling To: Los Angeles (LAX)

Date: October 27

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We have made additional arrangements for you on the best available, alternate flight. Your new itinerary is:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight Number: 1153

Operated By: United Airlines

Departing From: San Francisco California (SFO)

Departing: 6:11 a.m.

Traveling To: Los Angeles (LAX)

Arriving: 7:37 a.m.

Date: October 28

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I checked in to get my boarding pass, the gate agent offered to put me on a 12:50pm flight that had not yet left and was then scheduled for a 2:30pm departure. I would have had to scramble through security to make that flight (in less than 30 minutes), but I had scheduled a meeting with one of my CEOs at the airport so I kept my rebooked reservation on the 3:58pm departure. Then, after my meeting and getting through security on a reasonably leisurely basis, I get the following notification that my rebooked flight is going to be delayed by at least 90 minutes (from 3:58pm to 5:21pm).

Monday, October 27, 2008 2:30 PM

** UNITED AIRLINES FLIGHT UPDATE MESSAGE **

The following flight time has been revised:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight Number: 119

Departing From: San Francisco California (SFO)

Traveling To: Los Angeles International (LAX)

Date: October 27

Gate: 70 (Gate is subject to change)

Estimated Departure Time: 5:21 p.m.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight times are subject to change. Please check the flight information monitors at the airport.

Resigned to living with what appeared to be chaos in United's flights going to LAX, I wandered by the gate for that 12:50pm flight the gate agent had offered that was supposed to leave at 2:30pm. And it was still there at 2:30pm with a new departure time of 2:57pm. So I stood in line to see if I could get a seat on that flight (the number of which I can no longer remember) -- and I did. The irony that struck me as I settled into my exit-row seat with lots of leg room and no one in the seat next to me is that my original flight, the cancelled one, was scheduled to leave at 2:58pm, one minute later than the airplane I actually got on and took to LAX. So I arrived at LAX earlier than I was originally scheduled.

But the fun continued! I then got a notification while I was enroute to Los Angeles of a flight delay for a rebooked flight that I was never scheduled to be on at all (to my knowledge, at least)! And, if you read the notice carefully (compared to the first six), you'll notice that it has no departure time or gate. Perhaps it is the phantom flight in United's alerting system, kind of a ghost flight.

Monday, October 27, 2008 3:33 PM

** UNITED AIRLINES FLIGHT REBOOKING MESSAGE **

Dear ALSOP / STEWART MR II,

We regret to inform you that a delay has affected the following flight(s):

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight Number: 886

Operated By: United Airlines

Departing From: San Francisco California (SFO)

Traveling To: Los Angeles (LAX)

Date: October 27

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

But that wasn't enough! I also got a notification, time stamped at exactly the same time as the ghost notification, that the flight I was actually rebooked on but had abandoned in favor of the one of I was on when I got the notification (are you following this?) had been delayed another 21 minutes. When I landed at LAX and got this notification, I could only thank my lucky stars that I had hopped on the earlier late flight!

Monday, October 27, 2008 3:33 PM

** UNITED AIRLINES FLIGHT UPDATE MESSAGE **

The following flight time has been revised:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight Number: 119

Departing From: San Francisco California (SFO)

Traveling To: Los Angeles International (LAX)

Date: October 27

Gate: 70 (Gate is subject to change)

Estimated Departure Time: 5:42 p.m.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight times are subject to change. Please check the flight information monitors at the airport.

Then, to cap it off, after I had checked into my hotel and plugged my computer in before going to dinner (on time!), I got one last notification that the 3:58pm flight had been delayed again to depart at 6:03pm. I made it to dinner before that flight left the gate at SFO.

Monday, October 27, 2008 5:34 PM

** UNITED AIRLINES FLIGHT UPDATE MESSAGE **

The following flight time has been revised:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight Number: 119

Departing From: San Francisco California (SFO)

Traveling To: Los Angeles International (LAX)

Date: October 27

Gate: 70 (Gate is subject to change)

Estimated Departure Time: 6:03 p.m.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flight times are subject to change. Please check the flight information monitors at the airport.

As you can see, this was too delicious to leave undocumented. A total of nine travel alerts from United Airlines in the space of a little more than five hours and the only one that actually alerted me to something I didn't know was the original cancellation notice. I could come up with some kind of moral about alerting systems and computer intelligence or the power of programming, but I'll leave that up to smarter people. I just feel better for having shared!

Maybe I Need More Than Luck WIth Comcast

Okay, the service tech showed up only an hour after the four hour window for my appointment ended. But he installed my voice service and briefed me on what to expect and was both friendly and competent. And now I have Comcast Voice, the third piece of the Triple Play. And, guess what: I'm wondering why I left Vonage!

It took me 20 minutes just to establish what my Secret and my Security questions are. Yes, you need one of each for some reason, even though they come from the same list of nonsensical questions. Can you remember which is your favorite movie, so that you can get into your account a year later after you forget your password? And when they ask for my honeymoon destination, do they mean from my first or second marriage? (Who the heck came up with these questions!? What was wrong with my mother's maiden name?)

I finally get all that squared away (after very carefully writing down all my passwords and secret and security questions so I can be sure to remember what they are, which is of course the very reason you don't want to make passwords too difficult to remember because we're human beings and can't remember them!). And then I leave myself a voice message, so I can hear what it sounds like. But I can't hear the message because the system is unavailable. So then I go to voice mail setup, which requires a different password with a different security and secret question pair than my login to Comcast.net. And once I figure out how to set that up and get into voice mail, it turns out the little application for listening to voice mails through my web browser doesn't work.

So why was it that I left Vonage? Did people say that it was unreliable or that the company was in trouble because of bigger and better funded competitors, like Comcast? Huh?

Wish me luck (with Comcast?)!

I sit here in my house waiting for Comcast. The last time they were supposed to come, they didn't. That was the day after I moved in, when I wanted to make sure I had internet service and television service. Fortunately, I had my technical resource with me and he figured out how to make the service work. (Funny how Comcast really doesn't need to do a "truck roll" to make things work. Call or write if you want a referral to my ultra geek and you live in the SF Bay Area.)

In fact, now that I think about it, Comcast has not been to this house since I moved in. I hope the rep doesn't have trouble finding it!

So call me crazy: I signed up for Triple Play AFTER that experience. That means I switched my phone service from Vonage to Comcast so that I would have everything that really matters to me coming through one relatively unreliable vendor! That was a month ago. That's how long it takes to get an appointment with a Comcast technician (and how long in advance I had scheduled the appointment for the technician who never showed up).

I called this morning to confirm the appointment, since I hadn't heard a single thing from Comcast in the past month. No confirmation that my phone service has been switched; no appointment reminder; nothing. "Push 1 to hear the timing of your appointment this morning", so I pushed 1. The fellow who answered (pretty quickly), asked what I wanted and I said that I had pushed 1 to hear the time of my scheduled appointment. He confirmed that I did have an appointment this morning. I asked when; he said between 8am and noon. I observed that it was already 8:30am and asked if it was possible to get a more precise idea of when my service rep would appear. He said, "No, that's not possible. If he doesn't show up by noon, just call back and we'll get his supervisor to track him down and find out where he is."

That's really comforting. Am I really believing at this point that the Comcast technician will actually show up?

Western Union Horror Story

The customer service part of this story is bad enough, but my experience with Western Union actually scared me -- and that's not easy to do.

I wanted to send $60 as a booking fee to an individual in Buenos Aires, where we are headed in a few weeks. She asked me to use the Money In Minutes feature on www.westerunion.com. Seemed innocuous, so I plunged in.

You have to identify from what state and to what country you are sending money. Fill in personal information, including date of birth, choose a particularly strong password, choose a security question and match the captcha. (I had to come up with yet-another new password because Western Union has a different requirement than every other vendor: "Passwords must be 7 to 16 characters long and include at least one capital letter, one lower case letter, and one number.") I filled out the form, provided my debit card information (only Visa and Master Charge; does American Express know something we don't about Western Union?) and was told to call a toll-free number to complete the transaction.  Remember that all I want to do is send $60. So far, Western Union had already exceeded everything that an average e-commerce vendor requires (credit card + security numbers) or that a bank requires (strong password and a security question).

Once I got an agent, she began what I can only call an interrogation process.

*She confirmed the information I had already entered manually (leading one to wonder what the point of doing an online form was).

*She asked me the last four digits of my Social Security number. I hadn't provided that number online so she must have looked it up. Is that legal? If so, who is providing my SS# online so freely?

*She asked the security question which I had provided online.

*Then she told me that she needed to ask me four additional questions, which she was clearly asking as the questions were composed on her computer in real time. The first question was "If you had a car loan in 2003, please identify the provider of that loan from the following list of four companies" and then proceeded to name four companies and gave me the option of saying "None of the above" as the fifth choice.

I didn't recognize any of the four companies and don't remember having a car loan in 2003. (It's my normal practice to either buy cars or lease them, not to borrow money to buy them. I might have been the cosigner on someone else's car, but I don't remember.) So I told the lady that I could not honestly answer the question she was asking, that I did not know the answer to the question. And I asked her what I should do. She told me was not allowed to give me guidance and only allowed the ask the question and record my answer and could not move on to the next question unless I answered the first one.

I then entered an Orwellian nightmare, where it was not possible to move forward or backward and my only option, if I wanted to remain an honest and upstanding citizen would have been to cancel the transaction -- after 15 minutes of trying to move "Money In Minutes". She eventually transferred me to a "supervisor", but he said exactly the same words as the first lady. (Think they might have been working off a script?) So I answered "None of the above/Does not apply". I had to answer the next question the same way, because it was about a mortgage in 2003 (we switched mortgages on my last house three times and I didn't recognize which of the vendors they listed as the correct one). I answered the last two questions, whereupon the "supervisor" told me that they could not complete the transaction. I hung up in disgust and was late to my next appointment.

This is bad enough as a customer service experience. How the heck does Western Union do any business if they treat their customers with this level of hostility and rigidity? But I keep wondering: How much does this company know about me now? How do they know in real time that I had car loans and mortgages five years ago and know enough to try to trap me into giving them the wrong answer? (I looked up their privacy policy after this experience and, guess what: "We may disclose Information about current and former consumers and customers to the following types of third parties:" everybody including financial service companies, retailers, and governments. So now, even though we did not do business, Western Union has the right to share the information it did get from me with other vendors at its will.)

My conclusion: Don't ever do business with Western Union. This company has the worst privacy and consumer service policies I have ever encountered. It needs to be put out of business. And I am fearful that a company that is this incompetent knows anything about me and has any right whatsoever to do anything with that information, much less do whatever it wants to do.